Many parenting "experts," that is, those who got that way primarily from attending university and not so much from raising kids, tell us that children under one year or six months of age can't experience actual anger. These "experts" see newborns as pre-functional, emotionally. They say that even when babies sound angry, they're really not. They're just communicating according to their primal instincts, or something. It's unclear what these parenting professionals believe happens to babies at the magical age of six months or one year that makes them finally able to be angry when they sound angry. But I disagree with them on their basic premise.
In the process of having and raising thirteen kids, I've discovered a few things about how infants function. I think newborns are real people who experience real emotions. I think they're entirely capable of feeling real anger from the moment they're born. If infants' needs aren't me, they experience very natural human anger. And that anger can and does sometimes escalate into temper tantrums. As well, infants are entirely capable of understanding their caregivers' responses to their anger, and they're easily able to understand whether or not they're getting what they need. If babies regularly don't have their anger needs met, they solidly come to trust that likelihood and become predisposed to escalate rapidly into temper tantrums. If they consistently do have their anger needs met, however, they come to trust that likelihood instead and become predisposed not to escalate into throwing temper tantrums.
My first five children, as babies, all threw temper tantrums. My last eight children didn't throw tantrums because I learned with child number five what I needed to change in my parenting style. He was fourteen months at the time, and he stopped throwing tantrums within a week of my using the new techniques, which are now part of what I call, "Infant Anger Management."
There isn't any scientific evidence for the standard theories that every child throws tantrums, and that tantrums are a very natural and normal part of child development. There are multitudes of theories about what causes temper tantrums in children, even brain chemicals! The most typical theories, however, focus on children's: need for attention, low tolerance for frustration, inability to use words to express themselves, lack of problem-solving abilities, and lack of ways to express their emotions. None of these things are the real cause of temper tantrums. They are simply the things that cause pre-tantrum anger. If parents know how to respond to such pre-tantrum anger, it will not develop into temper tantrums. Children who regularly experience parents' appropriate responses to their frustration anger generally develop lots of patience and have no need to express their anger in tantrums.
The first step of "Infant Anger Management" is to respond properly to children's and infants' pre-tantrum anger. In this method I teach parents everything they need in order to totally prevent and totally eliminate tantrums in their children, even if they have ODD, ADD, or ADHD.
In the process of having and raising thirteen kids, I've discovered a few things about how infants function. I think newborns are real people who experience real emotions. I think they're entirely capable of feeling real anger from the moment they're born. If infants' needs aren't me, they experience very natural human anger. And that anger can and does sometimes escalate into temper tantrums. As well, infants are entirely capable of understanding their caregivers' responses to their anger, and they're easily able to understand whether or not they're getting what they need. If babies regularly don't have their anger needs met, they solidly come to trust that likelihood and become predisposed to escalate rapidly into temper tantrums. If they consistently do have their anger needs met, however, they come to trust that likelihood instead and become predisposed not to escalate into throwing temper tantrums.
My first five children, as babies, all threw temper tantrums. My last eight children didn't throw tantrums because I learned with child number five what I needed to change in my parenting style. He was fourteen months at the time, and he stopped throwing tantrums within a week of my using the new techniques, which are now part of what I call, "Infant Anger Management."
There isn't any scientific evidence for the standard theories that every child throws tantrums, and that tantrums are a very natural and normal part of child development. There are multitudes of theories about what causes temper tantrums in children, even brain chemicals! The most typical theories, however, focus on children's: need for attention, low tolerance for frustration, inability to use words to express themselves, lack of problem-solving abilities, and lack of ways to express their emotions. None of these things are the real cause of temper tantrums. They are simply the things that cause pre-tantrum anger. If parents know how to respond to such pre-tantrum anger, it will not develop into temper tantrums. Children who regularly experience parents' appropriate responses to their frustration anger generally develop lots of patience and have no need to express their anger in tantrums.
The first step of "Infant Anger Management" is to respond properly to children's and infants' pre-tantrum anger. In this method I teach parents everything they need in order to totally prevent and totally eliminate tantrums in their children, even if they have ODD, ADD, or ADHD.
About the Author:
Learn more about eliminating tantrums withInfant Anger Management . Visit Leanna Rae Scott's site to learn how to use Infant Anger Management.
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